There seems to be an epidemic of low self-esteem among my sisterhood and I find it disturbing and puzzling.
If what the New York Post says is accurate, Sarah Larson, the recent ex of George Clooney, got breast implants during the year they were a couple, to please him and to improve her chances of becoming a star. This beautiful, presumably talented performer (not George, Sarah) has allegedly bowed to pressure to enhance her boobular region.
But just who is putting this pressure on women in Hollywood? And which women are taking it on as their own failing? Have you looked at the ribcages of Gwynneth Paltrow or Sandra Bullock lately? There are two very successful, attractive actresses who haven’t undergone cosmetic procedures and have done quite alright despite it. If George talked Sarah into acquiring sacs of saline, colour me disappointed.
Now, it’s not for me to say what someone does with their body. It’s their business, really. But the reason behind it sometimes disturbs me. Happiness doesn’t come with a cup size. It comes from within and there seem to be an awful lot of chicks with hollow centres in our midst. As a “sister”, that’s what concerns me most. Why are they growing up with no sense of self worth? What link is missing in the development chain?
I have long believed that low self-esteem is the cause of most ills in the world. Break down any prejudice – even an inflated sense of entitlement – and you’ll find a person whose ego is resting on thin ice, indeed.
Two quotes I’ve drawn strength from are appropriate here. First, from the great spiritual mind of the insightful Marianne Williamson:
“Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous? Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of God. Your playing small does not serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won’t feel insecure around you. We are all meant to shine, as children do. We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. It’s not just in some of us; it’s in everyone. And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others.”
Or as an old friend of mine used to day, “Don’t hide your light under a bushel!”
The second quote illuminates the futility of looking for a sense of self outside yourself, from the wry and dry wit of author Jacqueline Briskin: “I feel successful when the writing goes well. This lasts five minutes. Once, when I was on the bestseller list, I also felt successful. That lasted three minutes.”
We need to find that successful and powerful feeling outside of those little moments that fuel us with it. And we need to instill that in our daughters, and our sons, as early as we can.