They used to say “a lady never reveals her true age!” Well I never claimed to be a lady! What a bunch of hogwash. Refusing to say how old I am would only support the bias that youth has more value than age and experience.
This fall I’ll turn 50. Although I would love for you to fall over in a dead faint of disbelief that I could possibly be anywhere near that age, I’ve accepted that you probably won’t. I’m not soliciting gifts (I have more than enough stuff!) and I sure don’t want sympathy. I’m happy to be reaching an age that so many I’ve known and lost over the years never got to experience.
So in anticipation of this milestone, it’s probably not a coincidence that I’ve been experiencing a sequence of realizations about how much time has passed, and how quickly. I’ll give you an example. Two former colleagues just celebrated their 10th wedding anniversary. I couldn’t believe they’d been married that long. Someone I used to be close to when she was younger recently turned 35. Again, a shock to my system. The infants of friends are graduating from university and having babies. It seems like every time I turn around there’s another “how can that be?” moment waiting to strike. Is this a mid-life crisis?
I have no problem with turning 50. I would rather turn 50 than not. And it was in that spirit that I attended a Smithville high school reunion this weekend. It was open only to those who are turning 50 this year so we could all celebrate together. I went with no expectations except to enjoy myself and I did that. It was fascinating to see how some people have changed and how some haven’t changed at all. It was gratifying to get big, happy greetings from some of the people I remembered most fondly but odd to also get big greetings from people I apparently completely overlooked in high school. That part of life was kind of a sucky time for me and for a lot of my former classmates. But for some, it was the best time of their lives. One woman said, ‘You were always so confident in high school!” I nearly spit out my delicious battered perch! I suppose I was good at faking confidence (still am in some situations!) but I admitted to her that I actually broke up with a guy I dated back then because he had invited me to his family’s pool party and I couldn’t bear the thought of wearing a bathing suit in front of so many people – that’s not confident!
Even though I believe I have a good attitude about this milestone I also feel a bit like a stereotype. I’d like to mark the event with something out of character. I could buy a sports car or dye my hair purple or sell everything I have and travel the world until the money runs out. I won’t likely do any of those things, which is fine, too. I can only hope that once the date actually arrives, I’ll still be as spry Sally O’Malley here, played by Molly Shannon on Saturday Night Live. Sally made 50 look like a senior citizen but she’s damn funny. Enjoy!
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